Life Since High School

Ok, so once again I have less time to write / think than I would like. I have ideas for three future blog posts in the works, so no worries on my lack of writing. I also feel this current post will help add to understanding me more. Today's post is one I wrote and posted on Facebook back in mid November. I got seven comments on it, all from family and good Christian friends and all positive.

"Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring enough worries of it own. Today's trouble is enough for today." Matthew 6:34

peace ~ Pyung Ahn

Life Since High School

I’ve been meaning to write this for a while. Some of you may not have seen or heard from me in a few months and therefore do not know how much I have changed, so I figure I should update all of you.

Sometime since graduating high school back in January and now I felt the call of God. What I mean is that I now truly believe instead of just going through the motions. Admittedly there were points over the summer and as I was going through conformation in my church that I felt like a hypocrite because I had large doubts about there being a God and that my sins could be forgiven. I remember as I was confirmed in front of everyone at church just trying to reach out and feel the Holy Spirit around and within me and earnestly trying to believe. Yet even after that point I continued to doubt.

I fully realized that God was calling me to him when I got to campus and found 180 Christian Fellowship. Seeing others my age praising God and Jesus helped me realize that it wasn't just all about saying the prayers and listening to the sermons on Sundays. Through 180, I have gained good friends that I can count on to have my best interest at heart. The Fellowship I find myself involved in has helped me truly see the light that God has in people and in discovering that light in myself I have been in so much more peace then in my past. Worship music has had a huge impact on me in that it portrays God's will and teachings in a manner I can understand and take to heart. Bible Study has really helped me to understand, though I still have much to learn.

Going to Abundant Life Community Church has also helped me in my walk with God. Being surrounded by a lively group of believers made me feel welcomed and I feel free to worship as I please. I went back home recently and went to church with my mother to First Lutheran Church and I realized as I was flipping through the hymnal that the structure of set prayers and standard hymn type songs, while great to a lifelong believer, was also what was keeping me from worshiping whole heartedly.

Through worship songs, I fully realized the significance of Jesus and his sacrifice on the cross to save us from our own sins. I struggle to call myself worthy to be a Christian because of my sins and even now I still doubt that I can be truly cleansed of my sins, but my savior Jesus gives me strength and strengthens my faith to know that even the most sinful can be saved because of his blood.